It has long been customary to spread rice, rice, or the like on the heads of the bride and groom at weddings. This ancient custom encourages the couple to have children and is a symbol of fertility. The message is quite clear. Society expects husband and wife to have a child and thus bear fruit. Of course, we are not just talking about society. People around and acquaintances, from parents and family elders to friends, all speak directly or indirectly about this expectation and encourage the couple to have children. But what if a couple does not want to have children? Is this selfish? In the following, we will talk more about this issue. Stay with us.
What have been the fertility statistics in recent years? How much do couples want to have children?
Childbearing has been declining in Iran in recent years. According to the news agency IRNAAccording to current statistics, the average birth rate in the country is less than 2 children, ie 1.7 children. This statistic shows that the average birth rate in the country is lower than the replacement level; That is, if it is assumed that we have one child for every parent, this will not happen now. In addition, the population growth rate in the country has increased from 1.29% in 1390 to less than 1% in 1398.
Certainly every phenomenon has a cause. Instead of judging, one can find the root cause of the problems and approach the subject with a better understanding. Decreased desire to have children is no exception. In the following, based on the studies and researches, we will talk about the main causes of this problem.
Why do some couples stop thinking about having children?
When we find out that a couple does not intend to have a child, we are tempted to think that they are not capable of taking on the responsibility of raising another. Of course, there are many people in life who deal with problems such as addiction, depression, mental disorders and the like, and do not really consider the conditions suitable for the child’s development. However, it is interesting to know that there are several reasons for not having a child, and this is just one of the reasons.
There are many who are financially well-off, patient, and self-confident, and who can love others. be. What are the reasons for their work? We will say further.
1. They want to be free from the responsibilities of raising children
You do not have to raise a child to know how much trouble he has. The early years, when almost all the time and energy is spent caring for a child. Waking up at night with the sound of a baby crying, changing diapers regularly, taking care of him in times of illness and illness, and in the future school expenses and many other issues. Many are reluctant to take on these responsibilities. They prefer to spend their time and energy; For example, to progress in their work, to travel, to pursue their hobbies, and so on.
These couples do not like to use the term “childless” to refer to them. They themselves prefer the term “childfree”; Because they think that the term is less judged by others. It is a decision that they themselves have made in the perfection of reason, and their preference is to live this way.
۲. They are worried about social problems
There are those who point to problems such as overpopulation on the planet, or to an increasing number of poor and needy people, or to children who do not have food to eat at night. In fact, these couples do not want to adapt to the situation and make it last. As their own point of view, they do not want to add to the problem, now that they can not be the solution. They think it is not fair to have a child in the current situation.
Another point that some couples make is the way people treat children. In fact, they think that the way some children are treated now in some societies will deprive them of the opportunity to grow and develop and healthy people will not be born.
3. The role and position of women in today’s societies has changed
Women have faced more restrictions in the past than men. The role and position that society defined for women forced them to stay at home and its most important function was to give birth and raise children; Something that the people of that time believed was the reason for the creation of woman. Naturally, such a view would deprive women of many of the opportunities available to men, most notably the opportunity to study and work.
But now the situation is different. Women study and work like men. Both spouses are partners in providing the necessary capital to continue living. With this in mind, we can conclude that many of the expectations from women in the past are now fading.
4. They see the troubles of families and their problems with their children
Some people point out that their mentality about family is completely different from what they actually see. Their mentality has been about the families of people who sit together happily and say and laugh; But when they see the reality of the daily hardships and difficulties of raising children, they step back a little.
Most of all, to see what pressure and stress the parents of their children endure to provide the necessities of life. Of course, they are not so blunt, because the results of some studies have shown that parents are more upset and stressed than others.
5. They want to spend all their time and affection with their partner
Many people get married because of this, to experience the joy of being a mother or a father. They always feel the need for this deep love for their children and they try to fulfill it. However, there are some who prefer to spend all their love and affection on their partner.
in the end
In this article, we have tried to examine the strongest views against childbearing and explain the most important reasons why some couples have this decision. Of course, it should not be forgotten that none of these views are revelatory, and the opposite can also be true, which certainly have stubborn opponents. Ultimately, the decision will be with you; Which group do you give the right to and what do you think about each one?
what is your opinion? Do you think that not having a child is selfish? What do you think about those who want to be free from child custody? Don’t you think that those who have the necessary conditions for raising children should do this and somehow have this task? How important do you consider the role of religion? Can encouraging followers in different religions to start a family and have children be beneficial for today’s society?
Your views in this article will be very helpful and will give us a better and deeper insight. Be sure to benefit from your comments and views.