Coming out of quarantine can be exciting for us and even motivate many of us to finally take the first steps toward change. On the other hand, the pressure of these new goals can cause severe anxiety, worry and self-criticism. Perhaps things did not go our way during this period and had bad financial and emotional consequences. To overcome despair or even depression, we must first learn to be kind to ourselves. In this article we want to see how we can be kind to ourselves and comfort ourselves so that we can continue on our way after quarantine with new hopes and motivations. Stay with us.
We are usually prone to go into negative thoughts and use phrases like “I fail too much”, “I can’t get everything done”, “I don’t try hard enough” or “I don’t work hard enough” about ourselves: In our minds, very soon, they are interpreted as “I’m not that good.”
Let’s hold hands for a moment. Let’s wait a moment and ask ourselves, “Do I ever tell my best friend, sister, brother, or child, ‘You’re not that good?’ We certainly do not say. Why? Because we feel love and empathy for them; Because we instinctively care about their feelings. Now ask ourselves, why do I say these things about myself so easily?
The answer is simple: because we do not feel loved about the most important person in life, ourselves.
Unfortunately, all human beings on earth are their own victims. This is the truest principle of humanity. Not only are we inherently afraid of others’ judgments, but most of all we are afraid of our own judgments. We are usually our own toughest critics. Many of us have learned from childhood that this kind of self-pressure or verbal attacks on ourselves is exactly what we need to be motivated and even successful; If the opposite science has proven this. It is kindness, knowledge, empathy, and self-love that we need to succeed, not self-criticism.
So how can we be kind to ourselves?
1. Do not blame yourself for no reason
This is a new concept for you. It is the same for all of us. Imagine for a second you were transposed into the karmic driven world of Earl. This is just like learning a new language. You will surely make many mistakes. You just have to keep going.
2. Practice, practice and practice! the more, the better!
Everyone acquires new habits after a while. For example, research shows that some people can develop a new habit in less than 18 days, while others have to wait up to 254 days. However, the more you practice, the more likely you are to be kind to yourself in everyday conversations.
3. This may be difficult at first; Normalize it
Think again about the example we gave about language learning. When you first try to speak a new language, do you feel 100% correct in your words and grammar? Probably not. You probably feel a lot of doubts and insecurities. The same is true of loving yourself. You may think, “This is ridiculous,” or “I’m losing myself.” You may even think that if you are kind to yourself, your motivation will be lost.
Although 100% of people have this experience, it is not really true. You may even be disgusted by the thought of having to give yourself romantic feedback. We are conditioned to be strict about ourselves. For now, it is your job to discover what that is and to bring it about. Keep rehearsing it until you can say it with conviction and confidence. “Repetition” is the key to building a positive self-belief.
4. Think of the kindest response you have ever received
This may not be easy. No matter how kind you are to others, you may not be able to find the right words to be kind to yourself. You may not even know where to start. In such cases, it is better to think about the reactions that others have shown you to your mistakes and the words they have said. Think of the kindest person you know; Imagine what he would say to you in such a situation, when you made a mistake or failed. Or think about what you would say to your best friend if this happened to you. When you are at the beginning of this path, you can use this language more easily by removing yourself from the equation.
5. To be kind to yourself and to examine your feelings, leave a daily reminder on your mobile phone
Mobile phone can be a useful tool in this way. Reminders on mobile can be set daily, weekly or monthly. Set one for as long as you want to remind each day to be kind to yourself.
Do not give up; Be kind to yourself and choose success
Quarantine may have been difficult for many of us. We may have lost our jobs, we may have had to give up our path to success, we may have lost many of our customers, we may have lost our social relationships, and so on. Each of these, in turn, can lead us to depression, despair, and ultimately frustration. On such days we need more than ever to be kind to ourselves and to judge our failures less.
If you have another solution that can help manage stress, frustration and apathy after a coronary artery and difficult situation, be sure to share your thoughts and experiences with us and your audience through your perspective.