Days when you or your spouse are unhappy with the way the housework is divided, the level of tension in the house rises. This tension can be a spark to start an argument between you and your spouse. If you ask women about their biggest daily worries and stresses, a significant number of them will complain about Mr. Khaneh’s reluctance to do household chores. Today we want to talk to you about how to divide housework between couples. be with us.
When one of the spouses is worried and anxious about the part-time work of the house, his / her worries will create a tense atmosphere in the house. It can be said that the amount of disputes that arise over the division of household chores between husband and wife is equal to the amount of disputes related to money. According to studies, most working women are forced to take on household chores.
Sharing responsibilities within the home leads to increased satisfaction with life and increased happiness in the home. Stephanie Coontz (Professor of History and Family Studies) writes in the New York Times: “The division of labor within the home is one of the two most important determinants of women’s satisfaction with cohabitation. Undoubtedly, men also benefit from this; “Because women are more attractive to men who help them with household chores.”
Unfair division of labor erodes cohabitation
Marriage is a partnership in which doing household chores is also a part. Housework includes shopping, planning, moving furniture, cooking, babysitting, handling, house cleaning, repairs, and the like. When things go well, peace, tranquility and harmony will prevail in the home; However, if the house is cluttered and irregular when guests arrive, or if you do not have any clean clothes or the roof that has been constantly repaired leaks when it rains, there will be discomfort and resentment in the house, and some misconceptions may lead to differences. Be wives.
Justice in the division of labor is different from everyone’s point of view
In one survey, participants were asked, “Is housework shared between spouses in your home, or is only one person responsible for doing all the work?” 74% of men and 51% of women answered that work is divided at home; In contrast, 26 percent of men and 49 percent of women said that only one person was responsible for household chores.
How to divide household chores?
Asking for help from your spouse is the biggest mistake in encouraging him or her to work together in the household. Asking for help creates the belief in the other party that you are solely responsible for the housework; But the fact is that housework is a shared responsibility of both of you. Proper sharing of this responsibility between spouses will increase satisfaction with cohabitation.
Here are some tips to help you get the most out of your homework.
1. Know your priorities
Each of you has to set your own priorities in your life together. What is really important to each of you? Many spouses have different views on the issue of division of household chores. The chaos inside the house is not annoying to some people. If you do not have a problem with sloppiness at home but your spouse is upset, you should reach an agreement. To make peace, it is better to set priorities instead of trying to satisfy both parties.
Discuss your opinion about home cooking compared to fast food and eating out. Get to know yourself and your spouse about dust, cleanliness of the bathroom, cluttered bed, tidy garden, timely payment of bills, and more. For example, if one of you thinks that the bathroom should be cleaned every 2 or 3 days, this issue should be raised in these discussions so that your spouse understands your feelings and opinions.
2. Identify obstacles
Also, make a list of chores that each of you hates to do. Maybe what you hate is tolerable for your spouse. If there is something on this list that you both hate, find a way to do it unpleasantly; You can also finish it with mutual cooperation: like a team!
3. Agree on a schedule
It is very important to consider your and your spouse’s body clock. Some people are from Saharkhizi and some are from Shabzandadari; So if you force your spouse to do housework during unprepared hours, you increase the likelihood of stress at home. Take the right timing seriously.
4. Review the program every week
Inform your spouse of next week’s schedule. Examine meetings, missions, and parties; Then plan what to do and who to do with that in mind. Do not quarrel about what you have volunteered to do. If this does not happen next week, you can talk about it.
5. Review tasks
If you or your spouse are not performing their duties and responsibilities at home properly, talk to them about why. Sometimes your spouse may not be able to estimate how long it will take to get the job done. Blaming your spouse for backlogs is not the answer. It is better to re-evaluate your program and change it according to the circumstances. Be flexible and let your spouse do things his or her own way. If folding towels in a particular way is important to you, do it yourself. If after talking about the situation you can not do things, it is time to choose several ways, for example:
- Avoid caring for parts of the house or yard to save both cost and time;
- Organize and divide the house so that things can be done effectively;
- Some household chores do not require regular maintenance; Avoid making time for them. For example, if pruning and caring for garden flowers is time consuming, sow the seeds of car plants in the garden so that nature can do its job, or if you hate ironing, leave wrinkled clothes in the washing machine. Ask yourself, “Is it necessary for glass to always shine with cleanliness?”
If you set your own housekeeping standards, things will get less stressful physically and mentally.
If you can not or do not want to change your standards, you can get help from service companies to do the housework; Of course, in this case, you must also consider your budget. You need to make a list of things that need to be done. You can hire someone to do things like clean the bathroom, dust, clean the windows, change the sheets, iron and repair the house. This help is not just for the couple; It is a help that you both benefit from.