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14 Behaviors We Should Never Tolerate in an Emotional Relationship

Study guide

When love blinds us, we can not see all the signs of a dysfunctional relationship. It is hard to believe that the love of our lives can have disturbing and sometimes dangerous traits. How does a person who looks so awesome develop harmful tendencies and habits a few minutes later? No one is great, and people grow and change over time. Fortunately, some small issues can be resolved emotionally; However, there may be problems in the relationship that the only way to solve them is to end the relationship and sever all ties between the two people. Now let’s see what are the behaviors that we should never deal with in an emotional relationship?

Many of these intolerable behaviors are due to a lack of self-confidence and a desire to exercise control and dominance over the relationship. for example; Your spouse may repeatedly accuse you of infidelity for no apparent reason. Make unkind jokes about your goals and achievements or try to convince you that your career aspirations are unfounded because of your inferiority complex.

Sometimes your spouse’s controlling behaviors can take the form of domestic violence. Domestic violence can take the form of physical, emotional, psychological or sexual abuse. You should never put up with someone who makes you feel inferior and worthless in order to elevate yourself.

Here are 14 behaviors you should not tolerate in emotional relationships:

1. Emotional or verbal abuse

Many of us accept emotional abuse without realizing it. Physical abuse is accompanied by bruises and visible wounds, but emotional abuse is accompanied by deceptive statements and controlling behaviors that make you doubt yourself. The victim of this type of abuse often fails to recognize his or her emotional partner’s misbehavior as abuse. Because the person uses psychological defense mechanisms such as denial and reduction to cope with the stress of such experiences.

The abuser’s behavior may seem normal at first. But the persistence of degrading behavior is a sign of a much deeper problem. Behaviors that can fall into this category include:

  • Your humiliation in front of family, friends or colleagues
  • Forcing you to ask for permission before leaving home
  • Unleash anger on you, regardless of whether the problem is related to you or not
  • Insulting you and using rude names addressed to you
  • Threats to take control

Prolonged exposure to emotional abuse leads to low self-esteem, distance from friends and family, depression, illness, anxiety, and abandonment of goals. You do not deserve such behaviors, but understanding the situation you are in and leaving the abuser is a time-consuming process. Use the resources at your disposal and helplines (1480 welfare counseling lines and 123 social emergencies) and be determined to leave this relationship.

۲. Physical abuse

If your emotional partner is physically abusing you, gaining the courage and strength to break up will be a long and difficult process, and economic issues can make it harder. So be kind to yourself. Do not forget that you do not deserve this abuse and you have every right to leave this relationship. When you are ready to get out of this relationship, you should consider several precautions and steps to make this change easier and safer. These actions include the following:

  • Gather all evidence of physical abuse to file in court to file a complaint
  • Make at least two escape plans and a safe place to go
  • Quality preparation with cash, medicine, legal documents, clothes and…

3. If not, saying no to sex is tantamount to hearing insults and blame

It is important to know that rape can also occur in non-violent relationships, such as marriage. Remember that consenting to sex for once does not mean consent forever. If your partner pressures you to have sex because he’s “your job” or because you owe it to him, your relationship is abusive, unhealthy, and unsafe, and you deserve a much better relationship.

4. Humiliation of appearance

When your spouse despises your weight and appearance, he or she has done something cruel and immature. In addition, he wants to deceive you into convincing you that you can not leave the relationship, because you are not lovable and you will not be good enough for anyone. This is a pathological way to establish control over the relationship. you are beautiful. Many people testify to this beauty. You do not have to stay with someone whose inner ugliness makes you want to think differently.

5. If your spouse avoids listening to your sexual needs

Express your dissatisfaction and unhappiness without feeling ashamed in the following cases:

  • If your spouse does not take the time to anticipate because he or she considers his or her own satisfaction more important than yours.
  • If it does not show a desire to pay attention to your desires and makes you feel bad about your sexual desires and needs.
  • Or if it forces you to engage in sexual activity that you are not comfortable with.

6. If your spouse underestimates your career ambitions

It is not possible to have a healthy relationship with someone who does not want to see you succeed. It’s okay for your partner to make constructive criticism or worry about forgetting the relationship because of work, but if self-doubt, jealousy, controlling nature, sexist thinking, and the like cause him or her to actively insult your work ethic, your accomplishments. Make fun of or even convince you to ignore opportunities for progress, then you either have to deal with the problem or get out of the relationship.

If you do not think about it, imagine how you would feel years later, after a wonderful experience of satisfying a selfish spouse who did not want you to be more successful.

7. If your emotional partner has kept the relationship a secret

If you and your emotional partner have decided to have a committed relationship, then there is nothing to hide. Of course, depending on the circumstances, both of you may decide not to make the relationship public. But if it’s different and he does not introduce you to his friends as a partner, you should take the matter seriously.

If you make time for this relationship, it is your right to be known. Has your emotional partner put you to sleep in salt water and does not want to appear committed to a better person? Has he lied to multiple emotional partners about monogamy and does he need to keep your relationship a secret? Is he ashamed of your relationship because his appearance or something about you contradicts social norms? You just have to be with someone who respects you and is proud to be with you.

8. If your spouse does something that casts doubt on your perception, memory, and sanity

Behaviors that we should not tolerate in an emotional relationship

An example of such a character can be seen in a mysterious film called Gaslight (1944) starring Ingrid Bergman as the new bride. Bergman’s wife searches for the hidden treasure with the help of a gas lamp in the attic. This causes the other lights in the house to dim. When a woman points out that the lights are dimming, her husband insists that these are her fantasies.

These behaviors are very common on the part of controlling emotional partners. In order to cast doubt on your perception of reality, they want to keep you away from friends and family. An unfaithful spouse, for example, considers your strong evidence to be self-inflicted infidelity. Or when he steals something from you, he convinces you to give it to someone. If you are offended by what they say and you want to deal with it, they will probably say, “It was just a joke” or “I wanted you to be healthy.” It is difficult to leave such a relationship because he will make you maliciously doubt yourself.

9. If your spouse wants to keep you away from your friends

Your partner’s desire to distance you from acquaintances with whom you have been in a relationship before is a serious warning sign. There are several justifications behind this, all of which are bad. Reasons such as control, jealousy and lack of self-confidence that intensify when you associate with someone else in your spouse; To the extent that it negatively affects your happiness, personal relationships and self-care. Likely Your spouse guesses that your friends will not approve of the relationship for good reason. So it tries to keep you away from those who point out the serious flaws of this relationship and their concerns.

The person who wants to take you and separate you from the world around you is by no means trustworthy.

10. A spouse who always accuses you of infidelity

You do not have to be separated from your best friends because of your spouse’s self-doubt. If aspects of your friendship are hurting your spouse, you should definitely listen to his or her concerns and see how your behavior upsets him or her. But if your spouse constantly accuses one or more of your friends of infidelity, despite your innocence and lack of reason for cohabitation, there is a problem with him or her. Your spouse needs to know that you exist outside of your relationship with him or her and that you existed before entering into the relationship. This does not mean that you are a traitor or that you are allowed to attribute such an attribute to you. It only means that you are an independent and multifaceted human being who has many people in his life for different reasons.

This is a dangerous problem because if you stay in a relationship without solving it, you will be pressured to end the relationship with your friends. Also, whether you accuse him of betraying his friends or not, he will continue his relationship without worrying about your reaction. These double standards make it increasingly clear that if you do not want to end your relationship, you must end his behavior.

۱۱. A spouse who does not respect your boundaries

Behaviors that we should not tolerate in an emotional relationship

Is your spouse joking about what has happened to you? Are you giving up drugs or alcohol and your spouse suggests you take it? Or does he just not pay attention when you tell him something to do? Does he talk to you about his previous relationship in a way that makes you upset? Does your spouse share your personal issues with others against your will? These are just some of the goal setting shareware that you can use. You need to let them know that such things end the relationship.

۱۲. A spouse who despises your anger and experiences

Just as you must let go of someone who casts doubt on your understanding, you must not tolerate a spouse who wants to convince you that important parts of your memories and experiences are trivial or unrealistic. for example; When a woman expresses her anger at her husband for repeatedly hearing street taunts on the way to work, and she responds by saying, “It doesn’t matter, think they’re complimenting you,” she downplayes this ignorance. And thus teach him things that his race or gender may have prevented him from encountering. In this way he learns to understand the situation of women.

If you do not start arguing with him and do not end this ignorance, it is predictable that you will be upset and annoyed in this regard. Likewise, do not let your emotional partner downplay your anger.

13. A spouse who jumps into your career

We always hear this, and of course it is true: conversation is one of the most important parts of any relationship. If your spouse is constantly talking to you, even if he or she does not have bad intentions and is just developing a bad habit, you should warn him or her. The next time you jump in, ask, “Do you want to talk or do you want to give a speech?”

۱۴. A spouse who attributes rude traits to you

Is your spouse having an emotional relationship? Past ٔ Reminds you and attributes rickets to you? Does it warn you about wearing your clothes with insults? These insults are a way to control you. This is disgusting and has no place in a respectful and romantic relationship.




14 Behaviors We Should Never Tolerate in an Emotional Relationship

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